Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(857): View more from Massachusetts

So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.

(617): View more from Massachusetts

And why did you do that?

(857): View more from Massachusetts

Tequila

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(857): So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose. (617): And why did you do that? (857): Tequila http://tfl.nu/gjpj

Replies (7) Good night (3787) Bad night (806)
Favorite
(301): View more from Maryland

Fuck appropriateness.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(301): Fuck appropriateness. http://tfl.nu/83xq

Replies (17) Good night (6022) Bad night (690)
Favorite
(217): View more from Illinois

I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(217): I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats http://tfl.nu/84a1

Replies (14) Good night (1926) Bad night (2717)
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for? http://tfl.nu/tolv

Replies (10) Good night (2119) Bad night (1170)
Favorite
(661): View more from California

God gave him joint rollers for hands

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(661): God gave him joint rollers for hands http://tfl.nu/1evx

Replies (10) Good night (3119) Bad night (1000)
Favorite
(217): View more from Illinois

Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(217): Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls. http://tfl.nu/z40q

Replies (16) Good night (4390) Bad night (1135)
Favorite
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(403): Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon. http://tfl.nu/v8j0

Replies (2) Good night (2093) Bad night (1064)
Favorite
(918): View more from Oklahoma

I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(918): I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever. http://tfl.nu/j10b

Replies (14) Good night (720) Bad night (3686)
Favorite
(972): View more from Texas

We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(972): We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away". http://tfl.nu/ker4

Replies (1) Good night (994) Bad night (469)
Favorite
(414): View more from Wisconsin

How's dating the med student working out for you?

(715): View more from Wisconsin

After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.

(414): View more from Wisconsin

A true anatomy project.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(414): How's dating the med student working out for you? (715): After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was. (414): A true anatomy project. http://tfl.nu/in9w

Replies (2) Good night (1044) Bad night (314)
Favorite
(913): View more from Kansas

did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(913): did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom http://tfl.nu/xnj2

Replies (5) Good night (1960) Bad night (420)
Favorite
(512): View more from Texas

You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(512): You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk. http://tfl.nu/ypfw

Replies (2) Good night (810) Bad night (313)
Favorite
(212): View more from New York

My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(212): My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon. http://tfl.nu/pnvy

Replies (3) Good night (511) Bad night (333)
Favorite
(561): View more from Florida

I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon

(850): View more from Florida

Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(561): I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon (850): Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found http://tfl.nu/d5sg

Replies (4) Good night (812) Bad night (290)
Favorite
(563): View more from Iowa

No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(563): No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever. http://tfl.nu/wpdr

Replies (2) Good night (521) Bad night (225)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: