xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
