i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
