Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
