i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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