Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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