dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
