i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
