no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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