I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
