I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
