i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
