how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
