the day after is always just damage control
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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