I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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