i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
i've created a new STD.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
