I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize