You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
