So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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