Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
