are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
