I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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