sarcasm needs its own font
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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