The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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