There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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