I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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