I heard we made out
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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