HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
We left an ass print on the piano.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
