I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
