What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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