I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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