Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
This is classic penis vs brain.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
