i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
