Well apparently he's into motor boating.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I didn't notice because vodka
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize