he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
