My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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