There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
