Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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