My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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