I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
