They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
