I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
