i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm experimenting with sincerity
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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