wat bout pragnant strippers??
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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