He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
