I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the night ended with taco bell and tears
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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