The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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