I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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