I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
My balls are so social today.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize