so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize