Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
handjob tips. give me some.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
When did angry sex become our thing?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Randomize